Steve Douglas

3 Minutes In The Hood

2010-12-27T18:26:00.000-07:00

Using the 8mm Vintage Camera app + iPhone 4 + Sony Vegas. The latest tools to make stuff look 40 years old.

Peak Christmas Video 2010

2010-12-27T18:19:00.000-07:00

This years Christmas video I did for The Peak.

Time Lapse On iPhone

2010-12-27T18:16:00.000-07:00

I shot this with my iPhone 4 propped between two books on my balcony using the Reelmoments app.

Radio Towers Fall

2010-12-27T18:06:00.000-07:00

I did this video for the engineers who wanted their ability to break stuff memorialized.

End of The Day - Sleepyhead

2010-03-21T18:40:00.002-07:00

Love the Landau remix of Passion Pit's "Sleepyhead", so I shot some time lapse video off my balcony for it :)

End Of The Day - Sleepyhead from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Number One in Tha Hood G!

2010-03-21T18:38:00.000-07:00

Zippo Tricks From Real MC Pee Pants from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

2010-02-05T14:45:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I Work On Saturday from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

2010-02-05T14:44:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I drive home from work on Saturday from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Building Implosion Shot From My Balcony

2010-02-05T14:42:00.000-07:00

Old Qwest/Mountain Bell Building Implosion from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Merry Christmas!

2009-12-23T22:32:00.000-07:00

Holiday Hollywood Hoo-Hah! from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Hollywood Hoo-Hah! 6/16/09

2009-06-22T19:52:00.001-07:00

Hollywoof Hoo-Hah! 6/16/09 from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Hollywood Hoo-Hah! 6/3/09

2009-06-05T10:45:00.001-07:00

Hollywood Hoo-Hah! 6/3/09 from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Hollywood Hoo-Hah! 5/23/09

2009-05-24T08:44:00.000-07:00

Hollywood Hoo-Hah! 5/23/09 from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Hollywood Hoo-Hah! 5/10/09

2009-05-11T21:25:00.001-07:00

Hollywood Hoo-Hah! 5/10/09 from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Hollywood Hoo-Hah! 5/3/09

2009-05-03T21:53:00.000-07:00

Monica gets some much needed help from Mini.

Hollywood Hoo-Hah! 5/3/09 from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Hollywood Hoo-Hah!

2009-04-18T11:50:00.004-07:00

Monica is back! Hannah Montana movie, 17 again, Fast & The Bi-Curious, Octomom, State of Play. Miley Cyrus a smoker?

Hollywood Hoo-Hah! 4/14/09 from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

2009-04-08T11:33:00.002-07:00

I still love Winona Ryder. Here she is getting a little "retail therapy" on Melrose today. Thanks for the pic TMZ.

Fey As Palin Pt II

2008-09-29T14:06:00.002-07:00

Dave - 1, McCain - 0

2008-09-25T11:13:00.000-07:00

Drill Swollen Palin.

2008-09-17T16:48:00.003-07:00

This is way cool. I'm reblogging a link to the Sarah Palin name generator. You put your name in and it instantly gives you the name Sarah Palin would have given you so you can fit right in with Track, Willow, Trig, Piper and Bristol.

I became Drill Swollen Palin. Very Nice!

Impulse And The Beauty Of Storing Trash.

2008-09-16T13:26:00.005-07:00

I just spent $140 on a trash can I didn't even know I needed. Let me introduce you to my brand new brushed steel Simplehuman fingerprint-proof semi-round step can deluxe. She is a beauty.

The back story: A little while ago the condo management had informed me my bedroom drapes were in violation. Seems upon inspecting the outside glass of my building after a nasty storm had blown out windows in 23 units, they discovered the lining in my bedrooms drapes was not of the white or off-white variety required by the association. I didn't know. No big deal, I've had the drapes up for a year and I was ready for a change anyway. I did ask if I should get some that match the plywood of the boarded up busted windows.

Saturday I go to the big Bed Bath & Beyond on Tatum, they've got the 95 inch drapes I need. They have a lot of stuff I don't need. Within feet of the entrance is a giant two-story section of nothing but trash cans. Wow.

I spot an island of brushed steel cans that for whatever reason turned me into Homer Simpson in a donut shop. I don't need one of these. I have a perfectly functional Rubbermaid white one that should eventually make its way under the sink once I clear out the other stuff from under the sink. After spending way too much time ogling the steel beauties, I move on to the window treatments. I found exactly what I had in mind for the windows in mere minutes, amazing. I figured I would continue through the giant horseshoe isle at BB&B to see if any other ridiculous ideas popped into my head on my way to the cashier. The whole time wondering if I was retarded enough to buy this trash can, all $140 of it. I was daring myself.

I sped right by the cashier to grab one of the boxes (yes, these trash cans come in boxes held by styrofoam wrapped in plastic, much like the packing treatment a flatscreen tv or computer would get). There, I did it. An absolute impulse buy if there ever was one.

After the careful unpacking and throwing the packing material in the old trash can of course, there it sat in the kitchen. My lovely daughter came home and immediately spotted the new resident. "what's that?" she says "that is my new $140 trash can!!" as she gives me the idiot-of-the-day smirk I say "and you can't use it, you have to use the old one" as any good parent would tell their child. Smirk gone. She thought I was serious. I wasn't really, I mean it is fingerprint proof and it does come with a 10 year warranty.

Something tells me it won't be 10 years before I impulsively throw myself at the latest receptacle as if it was manna. Hilarious.

Kinda Cool!...Update!

2008-09-12T15:10:00.003-07:00

...The documentary will be titled "Act Of God" and will examine the metaphysical effects of lightning. It's being made by Canadian filmmaker Jennifer Baichwal who has several international awards and nominatons (including a Sundance Grand Jury Prize), mostly for her documentary "Manufactured Landscapes" ...

TVOntario in Toronto contacted me today asking to use my lightning video in a documentary. Sweet! I actually shot this last year from my balcony. If you haven't seen it, here it is:

Peggy Hill for Vice President!

2008-09-12T11:45:00.000-07:00

The Sarah Palin Gender Card

2008-09-04T16:24:00.001-07:00

From the genius of John Stewart's Daily Show:

This Is What I Did Last Night:

2008-08-29T13:22:00.004-07:00

My Storm from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Observation.

2008-08-10T10:22:00.003-07:00

Sitting in the airport I've seen three people wearing bluetooth earpices (blueteeth?) in a short time. They're all dorks. They weren't talking on them, the were just in their ears. Unless required by law (like driving in Cali) don't wear these things in public any more. The "ooh look I've got a bluetooth" technical jewelry days have quickly slipped into geekdom. Take them off and put them in your fanny pack next to your pager.

Oops...I Was Supposed To Get Married Tomorrow ...My Bad.

2008-08-07T15:27:00.005-07:00

Mini was kind enough to point out that I was supposed to enter wedded bliss on 8/8/08, I completely forgot I had agreed to this last year after a discussion about 7/7/07. I believe some badgering by Monica was involved. All is not lost though, I had a Vegas trip already planned for the weekend and there is precedence for spontaneous marriages in that fine city.

I'll bring her back so everyone can meet her. Just as soon as I meet her.

Umm...Maybe We Should Try A Different Angle.

2008-08-07T09:14:00.002-07:00

The ad agency for Greyound Bus Lines must have thought their campaign extolling stress-free bus travel was money...until a guy locked himself in a bus and decaptitated another passenger! I mean...wow. This is an actual ad in Toronto...needless to say, the're trying to take these down as soon as they can.

I Am The Master Of Spanning The Spectrum.

2008-08-04T09:26:00.004-07:00

Worked on 2 vids over the weekend. One is a timelapse of Camelback Mountain, 50 minutes compressed to one. The other video is Kramervision IV...which lapses everything else, and it's worth it to see the man try to fit into a 2-sizes-too-small Mamma Mia T-shirt.

And it's nice to be back into editing again - feels good.

Timelapse Test 3 from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.
Kramervision IV - Kramer's Off The Market from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Kramervision III - The Dark Kramer

2008-07-24T08:49:00.002-07:00

Kramer found a woman. I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried.

Kramervision III - The Dark Kramer from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Time Lapse Stuff I Shot 7/21

2008-07-22T10:22:00.003-07:00

AZ Sky from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

How Long...Really? Confessionize!

2008-07-16T16:01:00.002-07:00

Been too long since I ran something up this blog, sorry. This one is worth it - The Confessionizer! - I love this. Part voyeur, some relatable, all curious. Are you on here? Am I on here? No one will ever know. I'm going to set up the RSS feed on the right, right?

Death By Marathon.

2008-06-08T09:40:00.003-07:00

Not the running kind, although that could be accomplished in the literal sense I'm sure.

I don't know why but I've become such a glutton of TV marathons. I didn't think much about it until the latest one, after which I felt guilty for allowing this excess to even minutely alter my behavior. A basic tenet of addiction, right? I blame it all on the lumberjacks.

Watching Ana Ivanovic win her first slam event at The French Open Saturday morning was nice, then again watching Ana Ivanovic doing anything is ...well, not so difficult. I flipped over to History HD after that for some inane background noise as I set about to conquer the rest of Saturday.

Ax Men. This should be boring enough to drive me out of the house on a sunny warm Saturday right? The plan was to clean the place up a bit, hit the pool, the mall, then maybe play some blackjack. Pretty casual yes, but the makings of a great day because of it. Wrong. I guess I must have looked up at the TV one too many times, I soon found myself cleaning only during commercials, pausing and rewinding, setting the DVR to catch the later episodes. This is ridiculous. I actually set the goal of leaving the house at the end of an episode, a goal I reset with the start of a new episode. Even though I had the DVR set to record all of them.

This show chronicles a few lumber operations in Oregon in reality show form. There isn't anything particularly awe inspiring about the characters. In fact, you could seriously question anybody who would aspire to be a logger. The mortality rate is high, the education level is low. Maybe that was the attraction. I read a forum post where somebody had sarcastically stated they should make a reality show about hemp growers, but nobody would lose a hand or get crushed by a log. Nobody would watch either. As I write this History HD is running the Ice Road Truckers marathon. I'm not watching, I'm afraid I'm turning into this millenniums crack-head, the reality show addict.

Now if they would ever offer an Ana Ivanovic marathon....

Kramervision: Episode II - Kramer vs. Kramer

2008-06-02T08:22:00.002-07:00

Kramer sees his own shadow...and is semi-happy.
Kramervision! Episode II: Kramer vs. Kramer from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

I Can't Sleep.

2008-05-11T15:38:00.007-07:00

So I decdided to make myself a little less usesless (emphasis on little) while I stared at the internets at 5:30am. I set the Sony on a tripod on my balcony, this is about 25 minutes compressed into 1:40. If you follow the title link you can see it in HD on the Vimeo site
Camelback Sunrise from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Here:

2008-05-10T10:05:00.006-07:00

couldn't get the video's to embed yesterday... I
Kramervision! from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.
Sar...nevermind. from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.
Sarah What? from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

The Possibilites Are...

2008-05-09T13:44:00.005-07:00

I've decided to spin off a couple of video projects from the normal Peak stuff that I do. These two vid blogs will focus on two people; Kramer and Sarah. How far I can take it will be up to them but it will be a nice ride and as different as two people can be. Kramervision and Channel Sarah .

I'm Addicted To This.

2008-05-08T07:34:00.004-07:00

Her name is Jessica. I don't know her personally, I know no one who does. I've been hooked on video blogs lately and I stumbled on Jessica while wandering around Vimeo (my favorite video hosting site). I don't know if I could do this - I don't think many guys can at this level. Guy video blogs usually involve pranking or being pissed about someone/something. At the risk of being creepy-stalkerish, I'm addicted.
Video Blog 5 from Jessica Schroeder on Vimeo.

Happy Cinco De Mayo!

2008-05-05T14:09:00.003-07:00

thanks to Sarah King for the ps job.

Next time you feel stoopid....

2008-05-01T13:34:00.003-07:00

...know that there is always someone out there that can make you feel like Einstein....

From The Dallas Morning News 4/30/08:

A man has been accused of attempting to pass a $360 billion check, which he claims was given to him by his girlfriend’s mother to start a record business, Fort Worth police said.

Charles Ray Fuller, 21, of Crowley, was arrested on April 22 on an accusation of forgery, police said.

Police responded to a report of a man attempting to pass the check about 4 p.m. that day at the Chase bank in the 8600 block of South Hulen Street, Fort Worth police Lt. Paul Henderson said.

The personal check was not made out to Mr. Fuller and when the bank contacted the check owner, the woman said she did not write a check for $360 billion.

Mr. Fuller was also accused of unlawful carrying of a weapon and possession of marijuana, Lt. Henderson said. He may also face a theft charge in Crowley.

Lt. Henderson said he did not know if Mr. Fuller and his girlfriend were still together.

Swim With The Dolphins!

2008-04-29T14:41:00.002-07:00

It's about time I post something new here...if nothing else than to move the creepy two-faced kid(s) down the page.

Here, plan your summer vacation around swimming with the dolphins. They love that stuff!

Dolphin Head Butts Couple On Vacation - Watch more free videos

Ever Been Accused Of Being Two-Faced?

2008-04-11T15:59:00.002-07:00

These (or is it this?) are those India kids born with two faces. I've seen this stuff with cats before but not peeps, weird. Monica tells me all four eyes blink at the same time, that would creep me right out if I saw that all day long. So when the parents play the airplane game with baby food on the spoon, how do they choose a mouth? Will the other mouth cry because they've been slighted?

Sexual Harassment with Hayden Panettiere

2008-04-10T17:58:00.001-07:00

Know More Things.

Hmmm...what happens if I push THIS!

2008-03-19T05:56:00.002-07:00

You know the big red emergency button at the gas pump? I thought all it did was shut the pump down, apparently there is a little more to it as this poor mini-van driving lady shows us. Maybe she thought it was the Celine Dion CD dispenser.
Dumb Woman Pushes Fire Button - Watch more free videos

You Gotta See This!

2008-03-18T06:43:00.002-07:00

In February I posted a couple of videos where Home Shopping Network hosts get hurt on the job. Random stuff and way, way too funny. Here's another OTJ knucklehead with a painful result. It's a Canadian TV reporter trying to call an innertube race down a hill. I do have great fondness for anyone getting hurt resulting in my amusement :)

Is The End Near?

2008-03-17T07:32:00.003-07:00

Snoop Dogg appears on The View Friday 3/14. Snoop Dogg...and he's interviewed by Barbara Walters no less. I think this is what Bill Murray was talking about in the "dogs and cats living together...mass hysteria!" speech in Ghostbusters.

Big Stinkin' Wave!

2008-03-14T14:17:00.002-07:00

Here's a video somebody in Spain shot of cars driving near the ocean. It's embedded in a newscast so give it a second.

Fetish...revisited!

2008-03-05T14:03:00.004-07:00

In January I wrote about a guy subscribing to my Youtube account after I posted Mary's video about being in a cast and his um...fetish. Not being very well experienced in the cast fetish world I don't know if this even trips the same triggers but here is the cast being removed...on video. Knock yourself out.
Mary's Cast Off from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Landing Is The Best Part!

2008-03-03T16:13:00.002-07:00

Here's a video clip that pretty much every news organization has been playing today. A German commercial airline pilot attempts to land in high winds. He finally pulls out of it and eventually lands on his second attempt. Nobody was hurt, but clearly everyone peed their pants.

You Want Cute?....I Got Yer Stinkin' Cute Right Here!

2008-02-29T14:54:00.001-07:00

Charlie Bit My Finger!

The Key To Wedded Bliss?...Honesty!

2008-02-28T15:42:00.002-07:00

This woman is such a freakin' mess I'm beginning to wonder if it's even real. From FOX's (who else) Moment OF Truth:

Would "No Country For Gary Busey" be so bad?

2008-02-27T08:52:00.002-07:00

This is Gary Busey being interviewed by an 11 year old at The United Nation Children's Foundation Oscar after-party.

Just a little reminder that no matter how bad your day is, at least you're not Gary Busey.

Breaking News - Prince No Longer Hip!

2008-02-26T13:53:00.004-07:00

It appears His Royal Badness will need hip replacement surgery.

After some concern on my part that he would get some really unhip donor hip from say - a Jonas Brother, I feel better the new hip will be an artificial titanium one. That sounds pretty hip, that titanium stuff is in my really cool razors.

What I don't feel better about is his needing hip replacement at all. I now feel really really old.

The Smell Of Fresh Steroids Is In The Air.

2008-02-21T07:22:00.005-07:00

Springtime in AZ. We had some nice thunderstorms last night. Spring Training for America's Pastime is underway and the first Cactus League game is in one short week. Any given day at 1pm at any given baseball park in the valley you can sit back, enjoy a cold one (or three) in the warm sun and do nothing.

It doesn't differ really from what I do the other 48 weeks of the year, it's just a more legitimate reason.

Here's a rare pre-steroids rookie Barry Bonds baseball card I found.

Ryan's Last Day.

2008-02-14T23:07:00.003-07:00

Our IT Director Ryan Jones quit. I followed him around with my camera on his last day.

Ryan's Last Day from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

We may need emergency surgery...in the studio.

2008-02-12T08:45:00.000-07:00

As BNL say, "I'm the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral". Nothing is funnier than serious injury on a Home Shopping Network set, right?

These are two of my favs, not exactly new but worth the reprise. First, it's O'Dell and The Sword:

Secondly, I call it - "and that has never happened":

The Real Top Five Super Bowl Ads.

2008-02-04T09:47:00.000-07:00

Have you seen the USA Today Ad Meter results for the Super Bowl Ads?

They've been doing this Ad Meter stuff for awhile, they give 200+ adults a dial to rate the ads, then that becomes the de facto standard we must use. Or so they'd like. I have a much better and inherently more accurate system. Me.

So here now are The Real Top 5 Super Bowl ads in order (video links provided):

1 - Puking E-Trade Baby - The Best. I know the talking baby thing has been done before but this one is so nonchalant it somehow works so much better. And the puking payoff is priceless. The Ad Meter puts The Dog Training The Clydsdale at #1, no suprise. Who doesn't love a good horse-saved-from-the-glue-factory-by-yet-another-animal story? You could almost hear the collective "Awwww". Didn't make me want a Bud, but I am an E-trade member now.

2 -Pepsi Stuff with Justin Timberlake Well done. Nice to see celebrities not take themselves so seriously. "and then, JT, we close with you getting hit in the head with a flying car door." USA Today has the Fed-Ex pidgeons at #2. Not Bad.

3 -Let's Run Over Richard Simmons I liked how the Bridgestone Ad started out as a typical wildlife avoiding tire commercial then went to The Twilight Zone. The payoff is the guy avoiding Alice Cooper but having serious thoughts about running down Mr. Simmons. Too Funny. The Ad Meter had the other Bridgestone spot - the one where all the animals scream - as #3. Again, the animal bias.

4 -The Coke Parade Balloons No dialogue in the ad. The expression on the Stewie balloon made it worth it. Number 4 on the Ad Meter was Mouse Attacks Man With Doritos. I liked it too, just not as much.

5 -Bud Light Fire Breather Bud Light consistantly has the best creative. My favorite Bud Light commercial was not in The Super Bowl but worth a look, espcially for you dog lovers that want to know what your dog is actually thinking: The Ability To Talk To Animals. The Ad Meter also had the Fire Breather at #5.

Honorable mention goes to the other E-trade spot Baby Rents A Clown but it's one client per Top 5. My Rules.

You can see all The Super Bowl Ads and Ad Meter ratings: USA Today's Super Bowl Ad Meter.

There Oughtta Be A Law!

2008-02-03T14:13:00.000-07:00

So I read there are some 1,102 bills filed so far for this years Arizona legislative session. I'm sure some of the proposed laws are good, and some are flippin great!

Like the law to forbid human cloning. It actually reads you can't "intentionally or knowingly perform human cloning". I guess if I were to accidentally clone myself I could do so without fear of ending up in the slammer. Either one of me. Good to know. Rest assured I will do my best to prevent such an accident, one of me bouncing around this planet is plenty, believe me.

How about making it a law to get free air and water for your car if you buy gas. A Law? Seriously? Hey, I'm all for free stuff but what exactly was the process that led up to proposing such a law? Was someone so incensed at paying 50 cents for the service they demanded legislative action? House Bill 2664. I'm sure in someones world there is nothing more pressing.

Then there is the proposal to make it okay for bake sales to circumvent The Department of Health rules and standards. Man, that's gonna save me a buttload of time not having to wash my hands in brownie preparations. I'll be one happy hombre if that baby passes!

Then there's texting behind the wheel. It's already against the law to text and drive in Phoenix, now all of Arizona wants a piece of that action. This may cramp my style a bit. I live in Phoenix and as it is now I have to go to Glendale to do my texting while driving. I busted out this entire blog once I crossed 43rd Avenue. If that law passes I will no longer have any reason to go to Glendale.

Maybe accidental me will hawk some brownies by the free air and water station at one of G-Dales 467 AM/PMs.

Breck The Third!

2008-01-29T20:54:00.000-07:00

Here's the last of the Breckenridge vlogs. We had to walk through a pretty sweet snowstorm after dinner our last night there. Plus a couple of other random things.

Breck The Third! from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Breck Vlog Two

2008-01-28T19:13:00.000-07:00

...the continuation

Breck Vlog Two! from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Breck Vlog

2008-01-28T13:27:00.000-07:00

Accompanied by Executive Producer Joel "The Boss" Grey, I'm in Breckenridge Colorado for a little ski and fun. The original plan was to upload daily vlogs but our condo doesn't have the internets! (what is this, 2003??) so I'm uploading now from the Peak 8 restaurant. I will commence broadcasting from the Bergenhof restaurant at 2pm!

Breck Vlog One! from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Do's and dont's with babies - hilarious.

2008-01-24T15:18:00.000-07:00

Do's and dont's with babies - pics!

Fetish!

2008-01-22T09:14:00.000-07:00

So I shoot a video about Mary Reilly's busted wrist (see below), I always post my videos on vimeo because the quality so much better than YouTube. Not many people know about vimeo so I host these videos on YouTube as well for all the world to see.

I get a notice from YouTube about a guy who is now subscribing to my videos, NBD, I don't mind somebody liking my vids at all, kinda cool actually. So I check his profile out, he doesn't have any videos himself, but 90 per cent of his subscriptions are videos about people in casts! I love it! Here, check for yourself: cast fetish guy's YouTube.

You can't make up stuff like this. I don't know anybody else in a cast so it may be awhile before I can push his button again, but at least Mary and I could give him a few minutes of sweaty palpitations. Just doin' our part for society I guess.

Mary's all busted. from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

I love the Hoo-Hah!

2008-01-16T16:03:00.000-07:00

Hollywood Hoo-Hah! 1/16 from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Lucy says hi.

2008-01-10T10:42:00.001-07:00

Lucy says hi. from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Ever play 20Q?

2008-01-09T06:32:00.000-07:00

My buddy Chad gave me the hand held 20Q game for Christmas. I had never seen it but judging by the immediate squeals when I opened it by The Girls Of George & Dragon where we were enjoying a holiday Stella, I may be one of the last on earth to know this game. The first item I thought of, a Christmas Tree, it nailed in the 20 questions. The second, beer (of course), it needed 25 (it'll ask 5 more if it guesses wrong after 20). It guessed whiskey, close but not quite.

I brought it to The Peak and had Mary, Mini and Monica play it. Mary had played it before while Mini and Monica were the other two on earth to not know what it was. Oddly, it guessed wrong for all three (even with the help of MC Hammer!). Mary's was hockey, Mini's was her truck...and Monica? Well, she insists she is much more creative as you can see in the video:
The Girls Play 20Q from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

We're Sinking! We're Sinking!

2008-01-03T15:10:00.000-07:00

I was talking about this ad for Berlitz in our jock meeting Wednesday, too funny not to share if you haven't seen it.

The New Years Resolution

2008-01-02T14:17:00.000-07:00

You really can't get away from reading or seeing stories about your New Years Resolution now can you?. Same thing happens every year. Your resolutions are really big business as you can probably tell by watching TV, between the ads for every weight loss company known to man and recycled "news" stories about how to keep your resolutions complete with experts. We need these experts, they tell us we need support groups or at least a buddy system to stick to our goals (yes, they'll be your buddy for a nominal fee). Did you know that most of you that make resolutions give up 6 months into the year?

My New Year's Resolution? I'm going to raise my Cholesterol. The idea is to set attainable goals people. My goal is to raise it 20 points by summer. I'm not payin' an expert to stand over me with words of encouragement while I ponder ordering a cheeseburger either. No way. Care to join me? I've got a stick of real butter with your name on it.

Happy New Year!

I lost my friend today.

2007-12-27T18:33:00.000-07:00

This just sucks. A few days ago I told you about my friend Mark Sullivan. He died today.

Mark had a congenital condition that eventually compromised his heart to the point he needed a transplant. His condition deteriorated so rapidly he went from his happy-go-lucky self 10 days ago to his heart finally giving out at 9am today. Mark was 40 years old.

Mark had his spleen removed a few days after birth leaving a decent sized scar on his torso. He was so unassuming and always deflected attention away from what we would later learn was his knowing any day could be the day. Once, a girl he was seeing asked me about Mark getting bit by a shark. I asked her what the hell she was talking about, she said "I saw the scar on his abdomen and I asked him what happened, he said he got bit by a shark". Knowing Mark he was laughing the whole time.

I've known Mark for 15 years and I was fortunate to be his roommate in Raleigh for 6 months. Mark was a good looking guy, played guitar, wrote songs, and was a genuinely great human being. Needless to say the ladies loved him. But it wasn't some skank-ho fest at our place, there were no strippers, no dumb-asses, no body shots. Marine Biologists and aspiring Psychologists and such. It was one of the best times I ever had, and I'm pretty sure it was for Mark as well.

I moved back to Denver, Mark eventually moved on...first to Jacksonville at the legendary WAPE. I hooked him up with John Peake who brought him to the even more legendary KRBE, Houston. Mark was big time. He would go on to Minneapolis, Tucson, even Mankato Minnesota where he thought he wanted to be a Program Director. Mark last radio days were spent in Chicago at Love FM, within earshot of his hometown.

3 months ago they told Mark he would need a heart and liver transplant by the end of the year. He almost made it, we all thought he would. We all just took the cue from his optimism, he thought it was no big deal. When it was all said and done he would just tell people he got bit by another shark. That was Mark.

Donate your organs if you're not set up to do so already. And I hope somebody like Mark will cross your path, you'll be a much better person because of it. Trust me.

Hear Mark's music on his MySpace page: http://www.myspace.com/marksullymusic

'Twas 3 days before Christmas...

2007-12-26T15:28:00.000-07:00

So I worked Saturday at The Peak until 2pm, decided I'd head over to the new Big Mama Jama Target (I forget what they name it but you know what I mean). I had to pick up wrapping paper and a few stocking stuffers. I know, the Saturday before Christmas at Target, but that is the point of this post. I fully expected there might be another shopper or two. I had zero problem with it, I was in no hurry, destine to enjoy every minute no matter how long it took. Not everyone uses this Zen-like approach as you might guess.

At one point I overheard a woman in the next aisle greet a man she obviously hadn't seen in some time, "...doing some Christmas shopping?" or some such small talk. To which the guy responds "yeah...I hate this f**king store, everybody in here is an idiot!, I hate this f**king store!"

Now, I'm no Mensa member, so I couldn't resist wheeling around to see what one looked like. I mean, declaring the rest of us idiots and all. As it turned out I don't think he was Mensa, as a matter of fact it appears his frustration might come from Target being way out of his league. Whatever genius-man does for a living, it apparently doesn't include a dental plan or a clothing allowance as he appeared to be limited to free T-shirts and Dollar Store pants. About that time a red-face wife-looking woman corralled him up, no doubt adding to the list of reasons why she cant live without him, and hastily moved on.

I moved on to the greeting card section, my last need. As I approached I noticed a guy wearing a skirt. A kilt is probably a more accurate description, but still not very manly. He had two adorable small children in the cart with him, very hippie like. Soon a woman, I'll call his common-law wife for the sake of my amusement, appeared from one of the other card aisles in what was surely a home-made full length skirt. Very hippie like. She was a bit frustrated, I guess she couldn't find a card that just said "Happy Holidays", I could sense skirt-wearin' hippie-man getting agitated. While the two hippie kids enjoyed themselves, dad used the opportunity to denounce the season, damn us! "Welcome to the over-commercialization of Christmas! This is what you get people!"

Here's a tip - you have no condemning authority whatsoever if you are a man wearing a skirt. Period.

As the wiseless hippie children stopped, sensing their no doubt normally placid father had cracked, they quickly took their cue from The Stranger chuckling at skirt-wearing Pops.

Here's my point, I really don't care what you wear or who you are, thereby don't embarrass yourself by trying to be what you're not. If you hate Target, stick with the swap meet or stores that sell Jack Daniels mirrors. No need to roll into Target and start dropping f-bombs. And the commercial aspect of Christmas is a lot of fun for most of us, if not you then please stay home and make presents from twigs and granola. People would probably expect it of you anyway.

I had a blast this Christmas, I hope you did too.

Merry Christmas 1988

2007-12-25T09:18:00.000-07:00

My daughter Sheila left this for me this Christmas Morning.One of her many nicknames, "bench", comes from the Miss Finch character in The Sesame Street Movie. Sheila always called her Miss Bench.

Ugh.

2007-12-22T12:00:00.001-07:00

This is my buddy Mark Sullivan, you can call him Sully if you want, or Dino. Dino was a radio name he used, sometimes with the last name De-Loro. He was emphatic that you use a hyphen when spelling his made-up last name.

Mark is going to be spending this Christmas hooked up to tubes in the ICU at The University of Chicago Hospital. He's awaiting a heart/liver transplant that he needs pretty quickly.

This pic pretty much sums up his personality, always laughing about something. Unbelievably, I've never seen or heard the guy pissed about anything. Yep, he's that cool. This would be the epitome of the"why do bad things happen to good people"question, but I will certainly stay optimistic, he would.

Merry Christmas Dino!

"She sucks at life!"

2007-12-18T07:37:00.000-07:00

Quickie Survivor update...Fatty Courtney made it to the final vote! I was actually pulling for her after watching the other three, she sorta perfected that "whatever" attitude while the others were either grovelling or lying ad nauseum. She even managed to blurt out that the low-totem-pole-lunch-lady Denise "sucks at life" (she later apologized). Too Funny. And BTW, Denise will proudly maintain that mullet because it makes her feel like a lady, thank you very much. The Producers gave her 50 grand at the last minute, I guess they figure keeping her and her family in Marlboro Reds and Easy Mac for life was a small price to pay for entertaining the nation.

Survivor winner Gay Mormon Flight Attendant Todd (I'm sorry, but these characters are almost cartoon-like, and I didn't make up the descriptors) managed to convince the jury of adults that lying, back-stabbing and cheating should in no way affect their personal relationship. Kudos to Todd for pulling that off. Amanda likes to lie too, but only Erik fell for the puppy-dog turned back-stabber face. One vote. Somehow I think she'll be fine, no producer supplementation needed.

Big Ol' JR, the exaggerated sense-of-self poker player who loudly claimed neither Todd nor Amanda would get his vote because of their declared art of lying, apparently succumbed to his man-crush and voted Todd in. His being the swing vote. JR even baffled himself by not being able to explain it when asked. My Guess? One look at the post island Hair Of Todd and JR was butter in his hands. Its the kind of 'do you make up when you're 6 years old and you've been in the bathtub for a half hour. The only thing missing was the beard of soap suds. It was Todd's last trick and JR is still roaming the streets mumbling an explanation to only himself. Congrats Todd and to all those that don't suck at life.

Survivor Fatty in the final four!

2007-12-14T14:46:00.000-07:00

Hey look, I like reality shows...and Survivor is one of the grandaddies.

I pegged Survivor China contestant Courtney Yates to get the boot early on, she's annoying and can't do anything physical. Now she's in the final four and I have realized my error. An anorexic in Survivor is genius! While other contestants are grousing for food and overwhelmingly preoccupied with the lack thereof, this girl is in heaven. So what if she can't chop through a rope with a machete for food reward, she doesn't need it. Her body self image is going through the roof! What other contestant can wear their Survivor buff around their chest?

How intimidating is it to be stuck on an island with nothing to eat but bugs and rice and have your competitor laughing at you because she's on day 36 with no food and loving it? There's no way you can win. It's like having a stare down with a stuffed animal. So, I say you go Fatty! Let them lose the will to live while you proudly display your skeletal structure under that thin layer of pasty skin! Now, about Amanda....

From my balcony this morning.

2007-12-12T08:23:00.000-07:00

Phoggy Phoenix Morning from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

What if runners were like skateboarders?

2007-12-11T13:20:00.000-07:00

thanks Mark Hitt.

Brought to you by Gnarstar.tv

Do Not Attempt.

2007-12-11T10:03:00.000-07:00

So Best Buy has been running a TV ad where two brothers try to figure out where the Christmas present stash is. One brother is on the others shoulders while the hoisted one peeks into the attic. I've seen the ad several times, Sunday I noticed something different. The line "Do Not Attempt" was super-imposed during the commercial while the boys were doing their attic attack.

What is it we're not supposed to attempt? Would it be not having your brother on your shoulders? My 46 year old brother needs no prompt to not attempt, believe me. Would it be not have minor siblings attempt? As if having kids do it for the sake of a commercial is legitimate while doing it for fun is asinine. Maybe looking for the Christmas stash should not be attempted. Or possibly doing anything Best Buy says in the commercial should not be attempted.

I'm sure someone from the Best Buy legal department who has more words in their job title and more zeros in their paycheck than me is guiding us thank God. My guess is this legal eagle got his or her ass kicked while playing chicken in the pool as a kid.

Move along...nothing to see here.

2007-12-07T11:55:00.000-07:00

Sometimes insomnia can be fun. This morning I woke up around 4:00. After waking Lucy the cat for no reason (hey, he does it to me all the time) and reading Kelly 2.0's MySpace Ballistic Bulletin Rant, I flipped on the tele.

I know KPHO Channel 5 starts doing news at 4:30am so I figured why not see if the malls in Omaha were still safe and secure (why people yak about big city crime when these "high-valued" Midwestern communities turn into arcade shooting galleries is curious). I didn't pay close attention until 4:31 when they went to their traffic center with a traffic person in front of a special traffic map to talk about...traffic. At 4:31am. Laughing by myself with a yet unamused but awake cat at all the green arrows as said traffic person covered all the area freeways. At 4:31am. In a somewhat failing effort to justify her existence she did happen to mention an off ramp stall or something before tossing it back to the dueling anchors. Then, like Groundhog Day, they brought her back at 4:36am. 5 minutes later. What do you suppose happened on the freeways of Phoenix between 4:31 and 4:36am? Well, as the traffic specialist confidently explained in front of her map of green arrows, nothing.

I suppose the folks at Channel 5 think that if they have a traffic person with green arrowed traffic maps at 4:30am viewers might see them as "the news team to watch". I think of them as "the news team with absolutely nothing better to offer so we'll waste time doing this".

All is not lost, I fell asleep before all roadway hell broke loose at 4:41am (I can only assume).

KPHO = 1, Lunesta = 0

Year 1999 A.D. - this was made in 1967

2007-12-07T08:32:00.000-07:00

Black Talk The Vote!

2007-12-06T14:48:00.001-07:00

Talk The Vote!! (with The Peak)

2007-12-04T09:27:00.000-07:00

Last year's Peak Christmas video

2007-12-03T04:52:00.000-07:00

The Peak Christmas Video from last year. from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Hollywood Hoo-Hah!

2007-11-30T08:34:00.003-07:00

Hollywood Hoo-Hah! 11/19 from Steve Douglas on Vimeo.

Apathy and I-vo-reee

2007-10-12T09:40:00.000-07:00

A couple things from Wednesday nights NLCS Game 1 between the D-backs and The Rockies:

TBS is now in HD. I am picturing Steve, The Cox eCare specialist (see below), running through the halls, arms flailing, screaming like an 8 year old girl after The Programming Department took action on my comments he passed to them (again, as if no one else had), thanks.

The Diamondback fans are no longer apathetic. After being accused by ESPN of having "dry apathy" here in the desert, the fans rebelled at an umpires call - with empty water bottles. Right or wrong, good call or bad call, at least the fans reacted like a true east coast angry stadium crowd would. Except only here in the desert would you be nearly taken out - by an empty water bottle.

I read that stadium operations immediately stopped all alcohol sales. Ummm, shouldn't they have stopped all bottled water sales??

Colbert knows who started the war!!

2007-10-09T16:20:00.000-07:00

Cox Sucking Update

2007-10-06T12:00:00.000-07:00

Well, Friday, 2 days after I sent my why-no-HD-for-the-playoffs query to Cox eCare I got a response:

Thank you for your recent e-mail to Cox Communications regarding your interest in TBS HD.

We appreciate you taking the time to advise us of your interest in the TBS HD channel. We understand that TBS may be advertising high definition (HD) offerings. We do not have any plans at this time, though, to add TBS HD to our line-up in Arizona.

Although this channel is not currently available, we have notified our Programming Department of your interest in seeing it added to our line-up. We value your feedback and strive to offer a variety of channels to meet the needs of our customers. We are especially interested in providing programming specifically requested by customers like you.

We must consider a number of factors, though, when choosing to add or delete programming. These factors include programming costs, program ratings and the effect that the addition or subtraction will have on theremaining line-up.

Please be aware we are planning to add some new HD channels after the first of the year. We are always looking for unique HD programming.

Thank you again for contacting us via e-mail. Please let us know if we can be of further assistance.

Sincerely,

Steve
E-Care Specialist
Cox Communications
www.cox.com

Hmmm ...not until 2008?!?! I wonder if this is how long it took to determine that the "Mojo" channel met their "number of factors". What are those magical factors that Mojo channel shows Three Sheets (a show about drinking) and Beer Nutz (another show about drinking) meet that The Diamondbacks/Cubs playoffs fail??

Pretty cool that Steve, the eCare specialist (I imagine it's much like a gastro-intestinal specialist but with less scrubbing) has notified the Programming Department of my interest, as if no else has yet. Hopefully they will take it under advisement first thing in '08, if they can tear themselves away from a Beer Nutz marathon.

2007-10-05T11:39:00.000-07:00

This is for the Chicago Cubs fans:

Cox Sucker??

2007-10-03T22:25:00.000-07:00

This is just dumb.

For the first time TBS has the rights to the MLB playoffs. The Diamondbacks are in the playoffs. Cox Phoenix doesn't offer an HD channel for TBS. I have HD.

Now I've seen plenty of rants on boards filled with expletives about Cox Communications, how people have called and written canceling services. I too wrote Cox customer service early Wednesday, a nice email asking where they would be assigning the HD broadcast of the hometown Diamondbacks. I got an automated response from "eCare" stating they have my message and a customer service rep would be responding ASAP. I'm still waiting.

I'm sure the really smart guys at Cox (you know, the MBA and CEO types) have enough on the ball to whip up crap about negotiations and rights and allocations and whatnot. I mean, I'm sure it can't possibly as simple as adding another channel like they did for the NFL preseason or throwing the game on The Mojo Channel as they have done so many times in the regular season. Nope, far too complicated I'm sure we'll learn. And as far as DNA mate TNT HD, can you imagine the outrage if Cox insisted on covering a Jerry Orbach-era rerun of Law & Order with a local sports franchise in the playoffs? (Something that WILL happen if game 4 is needed BTW).

Look, the wizards at Cox Oklahoma City managed to duct tape a TBS HD Channel in their lineup. The Einsteins at Comcast in Cleveland even figured it out.

The Diamondbacks themselves deserve some of the blame for not pressuring the MLB or TBS or Cox to figure out a solution. The problem is The Diamondbacks are the most disrespected team in the playoffs, they can flex about as much muscle as an Olsen Twin.

I don't have too many options, to get HD in my condo I must have Cox and as inept Cox may be as far as doing the sensible thing, I'm not getting rid of it.

I am a true Cox sucker.